Womb Mates (2015)

Joe Minutillo and Chrissy Scaglione in Gabrielle Burn’s “Womb Mates.”

Womb Mates

By Gabrielle Burns

(Boy standing near a upstage book shelf looking through a books near a single person chair and a ottoman, girl is sitting on the couch relaxing feet hiked up, flipping through a celebrity magazine, above her head reads a huge calendar that shows when the due date is )

Boy: (the boy finds a random book starts flipping through it as he asks her a question not giving direct eye contact) and So um (A beat) you know what tomorrow is right?

Girl: Wednesday? (she stays with her back towards him, continues to read the magazine)

Boy: Right! and? ( Hand gestures, shuts the book as well as starting to inch his way over closer to her) Girl: (Talking over her shoulder at him being that he is closer to her but still behind her) Mom usually eats pizza on Wednesdays?… which I’m definitely looking forward to!

Boy: Yeah, usually, but maybe (crosses slowing in front of her to the other side of the room still not making direct eye contact) before she eats we could, i don’t know, go somewhere?

Girl: (swivels out of her position as she closes her magazine, still sitting down on couch) Why would we go somewhere if were gunna get pizza?

Boy: Well I mean, tomorrow ( walks upstage, pointing to a calendar that shows the fact that the due date is tomorrow, girl stays seated but looks over her shoulder at the calendar) is the due date and in my opinion thats a tad bit more important than pizza…Don’t you think?

Girl:(turns not fully around to talk to him but stay seated) if we leave we don’t get pizza, (facing forward again) if we stay the pizza comes to us ( hand gestures)

Boy: right, but if we leave we get to go home to nice (Starts walking back around from behind the couch to stand next to her but doesn’t sit) cozy beds, better food and 2 parents who already love us dearly. Girl: we don’t have teeth this is the only way we can enjoy ourselves meaning eat pizza. ( Gets up, walks upstage left to bookshelf, picking through the selection of books they have.)

Boy: (plops down on the couch) They make baby food, and our very own mother supplies an abundant amount of food already in her.

Girl: (Turns around to look at him) Not pizza baby food! Do you see the shit the feed babies?! (chuckles in disbelief goes back to looking at books and magazines)

Boy: Its 2015 I’m almost positive that they have pizza baby food. (chuckles back, leans over to grab the magazine she as reading)

Girl: ( Still at bookshelf looking through the selection, turns head towards boy) I read a article last week, and the shit that they put babies through is repulsive! I’m not leaving! (goes back to looking at the selection comes across the actual article she read last week, starts looking through it to find the page with the information about the baby food)

Boy: But- but if we-

Girl: Okay listen to this, (Walks back to couch doesn’t sit to show the boy what it says about the baby food today) purred chicken with asparagus, does that (tosses article in his lap) sound good to you?

Boy: ( puts down the other magazine to pick up article and start flipping through it) Im an experimental person I think I can handle it!

Girl: How does that, even the slightest bit sound good to you? (confused and agitated)

Boy: (while flipping through magazine looks up for a second to igknowledge her question ) It sounds alright to me! (continues looking through the magazine)

Girl: No! it (snatches the magazine out of his hands, using it as she talks) shouldn’t! Tomorrow is pizza wednesday and your not gunna ruin it for me ( plops down on couch next to him in aggravation facing away from him)

Boy: (shoots up) Well all I wanna do it get the hell out of here.

Girl:Bye (not facing or looking at him she shakes hand at him signifying a wave goodbye) Boy: You- you cant just stay!

Girl: ( turns head first to look at him then turns body fully towards him) don’t worry about me, you can go, and Imma stay (kicks feet up on couch displaying contentment which her staying and him leaving) right here, and wait for the beautiful and delicious pizza to come my way! (a slight beat) More for me.

Boy: you-cant -stay! do you understand what I’m saying? (still standing near her)

Girl: (puts feet down to Lean in towards him still sitting) oh I definitely understand what your saying, I just don’t care, I’m gunna stay right here and be perfectly fine. You lemme know how that (shaking head disgust) titty milk and mush taste buddy, and ill call you and let you know how fucking amazing my pizza is! (Lays back down with feet kicked up on the couch reading a book or on phone) Boy: I bet its better than that nasty digested pizza of yours!

Girl: Ha! I really doubt it, I really do! (continues looking at either book or phone)

Boy: Oh my god why don’t you want to leave? (moves her feet to sit next to her on couch she is sitting there listening to him but legs now crossed on the far side of the couch) there is so much ahead of us! Just think about all the amazing things the outside world has to offer, Don’t you wanna know what our parents actually look like? We hear them all the time and that doesn’t spark the slightest bit of curiosity? (A beat) Well, does it?

Girl: Well, I-

Boy: You cant tell me that theres not at least one little, microscopic part of you that wants out of this whole thing (Refrencing the womb) God, everyday it gets smaller and smaller in here and I know your fine with it but guess what? I’M NOT! (shoots up starts pacing having an mini anxiety attack) I’m probably gunna end up taking xanax due to anxiety when older. (turns around to face her from the other side of the room) You’re that selfish that you cant just let me have my sanity now?

Girl: Selfish? i cant believe you would say that!

Boy: Well what else am I supposed to think? Every single day for the past month i have been going on and on about someday actually leaving this place, and you continue to still have the same response. Its almost as if you have zero regard for how I’m feeling-

Girl: no thats not it I-

Boy: and i don’t appreciate that if that the case, to be honest with you at times I wish I was in here by myself beacuase I-

Girl: (shuts him up, yellimg, hurt by the words he said ) Im scared okay?!

Boy: what?

Girl: I- I’m scared! and you don’t help my situation at all Boy: How?

Girl: How? oh my god. All you have been doing lately is going on and on about the fact that our lives are going to be amazing once we get out of here, how were going to be able to experience new things and people and places, and look I appreciate the optimism, I do, but has the thought ever occurred to you that theres a strong possibility that maybe that won’t happen, that we could leave here and everything could completely change.

Boy: And whats wrong with that? Whats wrong with taking a risk to be introduced to new things! and putting yourself out there, finding out who you are!

Girl: Disappointment.

Boy: And thats , we were put in this womb, on this earth to make a statement, not sure what it is yet but I know that whatever it may be, I refuse to do it alone.

Girl: what if we fail at everything and then our lives just turn to complete (a beat) shit!

Boy: we wont know if we just stay in here.

Girl: (Takes a deep breath in) Okay.

Boy: Okay?

Girl: Im ready to leave.

Boy: Are your serious? ( takes a moment to realize the fact that they are actually going to be leaving soon) oh my god this is going to be amazing! were going to have to start packing and making sure that we don’t- forget -anything! Because if we do i don’t think theres a possibility of us not getting it back (thinking in his head of ways to get stuff back if they needed to but moves on from the thought) Anyway, this is going to be terrific, (gasps) I wonder what they are doing right now to prepare for our arrival! Probably making our cute tiny little beds are nice and warm and made and making sure that all the hundreds of bedtime stories they bought are stacked together, in a alphabetical order of course.(gasps) Or there planning a party! With balloons and cake and streamers and people! Wow this is going to be (slams hands down on table on top of a big button that reads to not touch until actually time to evacuate) amazing!

(Lights dimmed, red flashing lights start to fill the room, an alarm sounds off, stilling the two babies and voice goes off saying “evacuate, evacuate, evacuate, this is not a drill” )

Girl: What the hell did you do?!

Boy: I didn’t mean to honestly, I’m sorry, I was just so excited that I guess I just… you know. (doesn’t want too admit to hitting the button)

Girl: Oh my god now were gunna ha-

( lights turn into a still softer lighter red, all noises turn off leaving the room completely silent for off stage voices from the parents, The babies heads also shoot up to listen to the mother saying to “honey, i-i think my water just broke, were gunna have our babies now” father chimes in (Adlibed conversation between the parents that gets softer as they go on talking to allow a music to chime in) the both babies are standing on both sides of the button, the button in between them on the table, looking up listening to there parents speak, both lower there heads down, the boys face is filled with a comedic smile and the girls face is filled with a comedic face of fear and or realization, music of choice continues playing, till light out.)